If you watch Ranma 1/2, you'll know what I mean by the Ryoga Gene.Losing my sense of direction once is my body's way of saying, "You need a nap, meathead!" But getting lost twice in a row must be the work of a gene that sprung to life somewhere in my particular strand of DNA.
Last Thursday, I decided to try another route bounded for home. I walked all the way to SM Megamall and looked for an FX headed for Fairview. I got seated beside a woman who resembled someone I used to hate passionately (better you not know the rest of the story), and to make matters worse, she was munching on french fries. What's so bad about that? I was hungry. She had food. I only had change enough to get me home, and I didn't bring enough money to buy myself some snacks. To get my mind off her french fries and also my way of ignoring the driver, who was relentlessy flirting with the rest of the female passengers, I brought out a book and concentrated on reading. The only time I put it down was when a guy started collecting the fare. Before giving my payment, I asked him loud and clear, "Is this FX going to pass Philcoa? (Dadaan po ba ito ng Philcoa?)" The guy nodded, and if I knew then what I knew now, I would've smashed the book I was reading on his face. For experienced commuters, you should have realized by now that the FX for Fairview stationed at the SM Megamall terminal does NOT pass Philcoa but heads straight to Katipunan, Commonwealth, then SM Fairview where most passengers get off. After the mishap, I vowed to be more careful when choosing a ride. The next morning, I went to Philcoa and headed for the area where all the FX going to Ortigas Center were. This time I asked the barker twice, "Is the FX going to Ortigas? (Pupunta pong Ortigas?)" He answered, "Ayala Ayala Ayala...." "Ortigas?" I asked again, trying to hide my impatience. "Dito po." He said and pushed me towards a van. As it turned out that van was headed for Ayala. I thought it would also pass Ortigas, because I did ask the barker if it's going there and he guided me to that particular vehicle. It was only when the van zoomed past Megamall along EDSA that I realized I was misled --- AGAIN.
As much as I want to eternally hate the barkers for failing to comprehend such simple words, or better yet accuse them of drug usage or being drunk on the job, I couldn't help but think if I had lost my sense of direction after all. It was pretty stupid. Who the heck would get lost twice in a row? Or perhaps I was being too hard on myself? Whatever the reason was, it didn't stop me from experimenting on a new homeward bound route yet again. This time I took the FX headed towards SM North Edsa.
From there, after a brief phone call with my hunny, I rode another FX that passed by Housing. Waiting for other passengers turned out to be annoying, not with the art of waiting itself, but because the guy seated beside me made an annoying "clucking" sound to convey his impatience to the driver. To distract myself from stuffing my P1500 corporate shoes in his mouth, I took out a newly purchased book which I finally got my hands on after a long, tedious search. I purposely leaned back on the seat, relaxed, and brought up the book head level, not caring if anybody saw the title in its contoured white font splashed in a sea of black on the cover.
It's not everyday you see a seemingly innocent-looking girl reading "The Satanic Bible" in public where everyone can see. Especially in a public where majority of the population is comprised of Christians and Catholics. On the back cover was a picture of the author posed before a symbol that made him look like our idea of the devil. Not surprisingly, the book caught the annoying guy's attention. He lowered his head to get a good view of the cover. I wasn't expecting it but for some reason, the clucking sound ceased. (Yay!) I also noticed that the guy behind me, who was staring at me earlier to the point of making me feel significantly uncomfortable, suddenly looked nervous. Who would've guessed such a small inanimate object, comprised merely of the text associated with Satan, could affect people so much? (I'm a former agnostic baptized as a Roman Catholic whose faith in God returned with the help of Christians. That explains why I'm eclectic. I don't consider myself a fundamentalist believer in any way. I have my own personal idea of God.)
Although my beloved hunny (who bought me the book, also because he was interested in the black book) told me to wrap the covers so my family won't find out about it, I was actually playing with the idea on purposely showing my family that I was reading such an eccentric book. If you want to know where I got the book, look for it yourself. No way I'll reveal my source where anybody can see, including the dumb ones. I think I've read enough to know it's not meant for idiots who: 1) aren't truly grounded on their beliefs; 2) possess AT MOST average critical thinking skills; 3) high emotional instability that may lead to a nervous breakdown or fierce debate with the author of the book who happened to have left the mortal realm long ago.
Since this blog is on the internet, there will always be idiots that may want to read the Satanic Bible but aren't strong enough to handle the contents, and when I say strong, I mean people who are either too emotional or too easily swayed by the text. I don't have any specific person in mind, but I do have specific characteristics as listed above. Any kind of aggressive objection to this entry is proof of one's guilt.
I can give carefully selected quotes that I think are quite sensible, but I definitely won't write down the rest. Here's an example of a sensible quote from the Satanic Bible:
"Love is one of the most intense emotions felt by man; another is hate. Forcing yourself to feel indiscriminate love is very unnatural. If you try to love everyone you only lessen your feelings for those who deserve your love. Repressed hatred can lead to many physical and emotional ailments. By learning to release your hatred towards those who deserve it, you cleanse yourself of these malignant emotions and need not take your pent-up hatred on your loved ones."
(Book of Lucifer, The Enlightenment)
There's a psychological explanation that confirms this. Most people with pent up feelings are more likely to destroy themselves emotionally than those who are known to release their hatred towards someone, provided that the feelings of hatred are indeed present. There is also longitudinal study conducted by social psychologists that revealed men who kept a few circle of friends were significantly happier, have more successful marriages, more emotionally secure, and are less likely to commit infidelity compared to those who tend to befriend everyone. It gets more complicated than that, but you get what I mean.
If you really want to know where I got the black book, and you know me personally, and we've been friends for years, and I know you can withstand it, count on it that I'll tell you. Hehehe. Well anyway, my copy of "Satan's bible" is with my hunny.
I'm still finishing Ghosts from the Nursery: Tracing the Root of Violence so I really don't have time to read it. I'll take it back when I'm ready to...write that certain something.
Oh! Before I forget, any kind of unwanted preaching in the comments page will automatically be deleted.
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